Diaper Roulette anyone?

I remember being an adolescent boy watching the movie “The Deer Hunter”.  It was the first time I understood what it meant to lose at the game of Russian roulette.  Never ever say “yes” when asked to play that game. 

As fortune has it our baby daughter has forced both my wife and I into a life of Diaper Roulette.  In this game when hours turn into days the odds increase and the stakes grow very high.  Holding the baby on day 3 of no poopies is like flirting with disaster.  You know a bomb is coming but when?  Now is a good time to have to run to the store and pray the explosive air strike size smash occurs while you are out.  You’ll know if you’re the victor if you come home to “Oh my god!” And “It’s horrible”!   Now is the a time for very quiet victory, you won this round whew.  Unfortunately you know you can only play Russian roulette so many times until there’s a bullet with your name on it.  This is diaper roulette and the bullets can be as deadly as napalm.  And there is one with your name on it trust me. 

I was on a 3 day winning streak when the inevitable happened.  “Oh my god”, it’s horrible”   suck it up soldier its only poopie!  You will learn to love the smell of napalm in the morning.  It smells like…victory.

About daddyadjustment

I am the worlds leading expert on myself.

Posted on February 19, 2012, in New Dad Survival Guide and tagged , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink. 1 Comment.

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